Growing up us girls are often told what we should and shouldn’t do. Wear makeup, but not too much. Be confident, but never bossy.

A lot of the time, this advice is confusing nonsense based on reductive gender stereotypes and expectations of what girls and women ‘should’ be. But in this case, it’s not.

This time, a list of don’t’s for girls has been put together that is actually gloriously empowering. It’s a list written by author, blogger and mum Toni Hammer, who has two children.

This week Toni decided to write her daughter a letter, made up of all the things her daughter shouldn’t do – and it’s advice we could all do with following.

‘To my daughter,’ wrote Toni.

‘Don’t apologize when someone else bumps into you. ‘Don’t say “sorry to be such a pain.” You’re not a pain. You’re a person with thoughts and feelings who deserves respect.

‘Don’t make up reasons as to why you can’t go out with a guy you don’t wanna go out with. You don’t owe anyone an explanation. A simple “no thanks” should be acceptable.

‘Don’t overthink what you eat in front of people. If you’re hungry, eat, and eat what you want. If you want pizza, don’t get a salad just because other people are around. Order the damn pizza.

‘Don’t keep your hair long to make someone else happy.

‘Don’t wear a dress if you don’t want to.

‘Don’t stay home because you don’t have anyone to go out with. Take yourself out. Have experiences by yourself and for yourself.

‘Don’t hold back your tears. Crying means you’re feeling something that needs to get out. It’s not a weakness. It’s being human.

‘Don’t smile because someone told you to.

‘Don’t be afraid to laugh at your own jokes. ‘Don’t say “yes” to be polite. Say “no” because it’s your life.

‘Don’t hide your opinions. Speak up and speak loudly. You should be heard.

‘Don’t apologize for being who you are. Be brave and bold and beautiful. Be unapologetically you.’

Toni posted the beautiful letter to her daughter on Instagram along with a list of inspiring hashtags.

To my daughter, . Don’t apologize when someone else bumps into you. . Don’t say “sorry to be such a pain.” You’re not a pain. You’re a person with thoughts and feelings who deserves respect. . Don’t make up reasons as to why you can’t go out with a guy you don’t wanna go out with. You don’t owe anyone an explanation. A simple “no thanks” should be acceptable. . Don’t overthink what you eat in front of people. If you’re hungry, eat, and eat what you want. If you want pizza, don’t get a salad just because other people are around. Order the damn pizza. . Don’t keep your hair long to make someone else happy. . Don’t wear a dress if you don’t want to. . Don’t stay home because you don’t have anyone to go out with. Take yourself out. Have experiences by yourself and for yourself. . Don’t hold back your tears. Crying means you’re feeling something that needs to get out. It’s not a weakness. It’s being human. . Don’t smile because someone told you to. . Don’t be afraid to laugh at your own jokes. . Don’t say “yes” to be polite. Say “no” because it’s your life. . Don’t hide your opinions. Speak up and speak loudly. You should be heard. . Don’t apologize for being who you are. Be brave and bold and beautiful. Be unapologetically you. . #parentlife #parenting #momlife #stronggirl #strongwoman #daughtergoals #daughters #momanddaughtergoals #momanddaughter #strongwoman #strongwomen #motherhood #motherhoodlife #motherhooduncut @todaysparent @todayparents

A post shared by Toni Hammer (@isitbedtimeyetblog) on

The post went on to be shared more than 4,000 times, and was picked up by Love What Matters, where it was flooded with responses praising Toni for teaching her daughter lessons we could all do with learning.

This is exactly the kind of advice young girls need, encouraging them to be whoever they want to be without worrying about what other people think.

Pass these ‘don’t’s’ on to any other kids you know!

Source: metro.co.uk/ @isitbedtimeyetblog -Toni Hammer’s Instagram